I heard someone said once, that zikr (dhikr-remembering Allah with your heart and tongue) for people is like the water for fish.. Means - its life accually…for your heart, for the health of your mind, for your ability to make good deeds, for all whats good in you..

Well..I felt like real looser when I remembered these words…Accually when I am thinking of the days of Ramadhan which are gone I feel like a looser..yarab…is my heart like this coz I am not making enough zikr? Is my heart like this coz I am too busy with the dunya stuff (which are my home, my children and my job, means I have to be concern about it!!) ? I just cant find myself in all this. I am kinda loosing my self in it. But really. I am becoming really worried. Ya rabb, ya Allah , ya Al Wadood, are Your doors closed for me, this slave who loves You so much, but feel like munafiq coz not showing You that love??

If You dont allow me to be Your servant, I am lost.

Sister Shahrzad has a wonderful idea and masha-Allah many blogers loved it. Honestly, it gives an EXCELLENT feeling if you are a part of it :) Please go to see what is it all about (it will bring you maaany hasanat;))

http://shahrzaad.wordpress.com/circle-of-unity/

Feeling away from You is something that comes to me from time to time…Without some particular reason, not in some particular time…just like that - it comes. And takes me away from You. I am sure I do something to make the job for shaitan easier. I am sure I am the one who makes the step back. But it sucks. Big time.

I hate being away from You. I miss You so much. I miss talking to You, I miss the tranquilty You give me after I cry in front of You…I miss Your care in small things You give me every day. I miss You so much. Wallahi yarab, I miss You so much. Don’t leave me without You.

My joy –

My Hunger –

My Shelter –

My Friend –

My Food for the journey –

My journey’s End –

You are my breath,

My hope,

My companion,

My craving,

My abundant wealth.

Without You — my Life, my Love –

I would never have wandered across these endless countries.

You have poured out so much grace for me,

Done me so many favors, given me so many gifts –

I look everywhere for Your love –

Then suddenly I am filled with it.

O Captain of my Heart

Radiant Eye of Yearning in my breast,

I will never be free from You

As long as I live.

Be satisfied with me, Love,

And I am satisfied.

Rabi’a al Basri

Living my life in the shelter of Islam, I have learned many things. I wouldn’t give it up for anything in this world. For some of them it took years to see it, many tears and nights without sleep to understand it. But I appreciate them all. Here are some of them :

* Even if you feel like totally alone in this world, you are not. The One who wishes you the best will take care of you and will sent you His help in moments when you don’t even expect it. You will find the doors of hope and forgiveness always opened.

*You will see that people do not forgive so easily. It can take you ages to correct your wrong doings to someone and to see that person forgive and forget. With Allah is not like that. One do3a that will come sincerely from your heart is enough. And not just that. Muhammad saws told us that Allah is welcoming every repentance from us, and He likes it more than a man likes to find his lost camel in the desert, which carries all his food and water. SubhanAllah…

*People don’t like if you ask something from them every now and then. Wallahi they will make you feel like the worst person in this world. They will think that you are not capable for this life and that you should start to learn how to live it. With Allah is not like that. He likes if we ask Him for anything we need, no matter huge or small. One more thing: He doesn’t ask from us to make an appointment so we can tell Him our needs and problems. No. His doors are always opened, day or night, you can talk for hours if you like, He will never be busy for you. Always there for anything you need. And plus: He will be angry if you don’t ask from Him. :)

*You can always, but ALWAYS rely on Him. He will never let you down. Ever.

*You will notice that the love you feel for Him is making you love all around you, it is making you able to forgive and to live in peace with others. Plus: Same love for Him is making other people loves you :)

*It is said that who makes his only worry how to gain Allah ’s pleasure, Allah will take care of all others worries of this person. Simple. Beautiful.

I had such a beautiful experience today. Alhamdulillah, I am really grateful to have this opportunity.

Sheikh Qaradawi was praying salatul-Jumu3ah today in Beg’s mosque!!!!After the prayer he made a beautiful, touching do3a for all muslims in the world, asking especially for unity of our ummah. He asked from Allah to forgive our sins, using do3a that Prophet, peace and blessings be upon him, tough Aisha radijallahu anha in the night of Qadr. Allahumma innaka 3afuwun kareemun, tu7hibbul afwa, f3afu‘ anna. He asked from Allah swt to accept our deeds, to reward Bosnian shaheeds and help us to keep our eeman. While he was coming out of the mosque, he was greeting people and saying salam to everyone :) I was standing not more than one meter away from him :)

(And we took photos, off course, will upload them as soon as possible :) )

Mashaallah, may Allah reward him for everything and may Allah swt give us more people like sheikh Qaradawi, who will strive to see our ummah among the best in the world. Ameen yarab.

Sheikh Qaradawi’s wife, Dr. Asma was giving lecture last night in the University of Islamic Science in Sarajevo. It was beautiful, her words made us all even more proud that we are muslimahs!! :))

Inshallah I will try to find video tapes of the lecture and put more of her words here.

I have a feeling that these days I have eyes only for bad things :( And it makes me worried, a lot, coz I was always the person who sees all the best in people and things around me. But when I catched my self yesterday with feeling of deep worry, thinking how, for God’s sake, my children, my innocent, pure children ( and all other kids) will survive in this kind of world, I am afraid now that I am becoming a pessimist. And that’s not good. At all.
The thing I am worried at most is that my heart, by living in this kind of environment, will become hard as a stone and totally blind, without possibility to feel all those beautiful things around me, which were making me so happy and joyful person. I can remember how deep my feelings were when I was started to practice Islam. Yarab…I felt the tree next to my balcony as a proud slave of Allah and this is why I was looking at it as someone so close to me:))Same was for the sky, stars, flowers, birds, just all things which Allah swt created for us, to make our residence here more pleasant.
Now, I am facing with people who knows about this beautiful deen more than me, who seems to be practicing and saying Allah ’s name 5 times in every sentence, but…they are making my heart a stone. Why? Because they don’t see Islam as a way of life, it didn’t fulfill all cells of their bodies, it didn’t lightened their souls so the light can not come out, to bring the good for others. They are cold,cruel, from Islam they see only hard rules, and if they have beard and everybody sees them praying, they take the right to change the rules if they are not happy with it. This makes you stone. Because they don’t see that tree or even thinking about it. They don’t feel the world around them. Except what they will benefit from. And you are not able to change it, plus you are forced somehow to live surrounded by their grinned faces, without the smile or noor in it.

Ya Allah make the Qur’an the noor of my heart, the spring of my soul and eraser of all my worries. Ameen yarab.

Its school..this whole life, every day of it , its school…New day-new lesson, it seems. Sometimes you learn right away, sometimes you need some time. Sometimes its easy, but it can be very very painful also.

But I have got a feeling that Allah is teaching me and raising me and even it hurts, I benefit from it, sooner or later. I heard few times one shaikh saying: “If Allah is sending you hardships, He wants you to be closer to Him.” Ya rabb…thats true..cuz we are like that, if we are happy and everythings ok and cool, we forget about Him. Ok, not totaly, but sure there is less of dhikr, no tears in salaah, we rush in dooa….Sad…but true..

May we rush to Him without hardships, in good and bad. May He open our hearts and hearts of all people, to feel the beauty of being close to Him. Amin, ya Muqallibal Quloob.